Welcome to Trace’s Space. I was recently thinking about a girl I use to work with. This was a little over thirty years ago, and I really struggled with remembering her name until today. I was sitting in church and as our Pastor gave his message, the Lord was strongly encouraging me to write mine, and this particular story/message has to do with me having difficulty opening a door in a spiritually awkward moment. It would be years before I saw that moment for what it was, how interesting that God gave me opportunity and I blew it, but yet He never gave up pursuing me.
I worked at Denny’s. It was a wild time in my life, I loved to party, and I loved the folks I grew at that time to accept as friends. We were a truly wild bunch. Young and dumb were we, a whole lot of poor life decisions, yet a good time was had by all. In the midst of this crazy bunch of folks was a young college student named Robin. She was beautiful inside and out, she glowed with the love of Jesus and evangelized to we heathen as often as she could. I really was drawn to her, just really liked her. She never had a poor opinion of anyone, especially her coworkers.
So one morning as we were serving up our grand-slam specials she approached myself and two other girls who were working the breakfast shift. She explained that she had been attending revival services at a local hotel ballroom and felt like she was being lead to invite us to come. She went on to tell us the services were nightly at seven and she really wanted us to try and come. My one friend says quickly, “yes, we will be there tonight”... meanwhile I’m thinking, we made plans to go dancing, we are planning on drinking, I certainly don’t feel like going to a tent meeting, and well my other friend, she was merely red faced!
Don’t think poorly of us, we didn’t truly know any better, so we talked and decided, why not, we can go do this Jesus thing for a few and the bar is open till two, all will be well!
So we get all dolled up, and make our way to the Ramada. I’m sure dear sweet Robin was surprised that we actually showed up. We awkwardly found seats, very close to the door, and then, they started having church. I don’t recall there being any worship music, I’m sure there probably was. The Evangelists name was Charlotte, a very stern looking woman with very tight permed hair. When she spoke she was stern, and her delivery was very Pentecostal, her speech deliverance would remind you of Robin Williams doing his best Ernest Angley, she was scary, well to me anyway. I’m sure I was feeling conviction because I knew I was there only because my friends were my ride to the bar.
So Charlotte starts to talk about sin....of course.... sure...we all fall short....I could feel the uncomfortableness of my friends and finally I feel a tug and one of them says, let’s go.
So they went first, quietly they exited the room, one by one, I never heard the door, then I got up to go, and boom! bang, slam! The door won’t open! I’m trapped, I can’t get out! I could feel this woman glaring at me, finally she says, “just pull, it will open”!
That was it, that’s all she said. My friends on the other side were crying, they laughed for hours at me! I felt horrible.
God was then pursuing me, I just didn’t see it. Funny how thoughts of that evening would come back to me periodically for years. I wondered if I would have just stayed how different things would have been. Not that I regret a lot of things, there are some choices I have made outside of Gods will that caused me great heartache. See I believe He was trying to keep me there, but when that door slammed I was given the choice to keep trying to get out or just sit back down. I chose to go.
God won’t hold you hostage, this relationship that you develop with Him is totally up to you. Even though I went my merry way, He kept after me because He knew before I was formed in my mother’s womb that He had something special just for me.
I was actually changed by that moment, when I was ready the next door was easier to walk through, the difference being I wasn’t walking away, I was running in!
If you seek Him you will find Him, knock and He will answer, just know this, He is always pursuing His children, and no matter how far you have gone, He has the ultimate open door policy?
Today I pray for you, if you feel a door has been slammed in your face and that you are not welcomed as a true friend of God, I pray that you see that as a fib, I pray that you recognize that His door is easily opened, and that you just simply step on in!
See you next time!
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